Go home, Shizuo, you're drunk
by ChocMochi
Summary: - Shizuo felt his heart break into a million pieces. He looked down at the ground, as if he was looking for the pieces that had 'fallen'. He looked up at Izaya again, a kicked-puppy expression on his face, and he definitely looked lost. "Izaya?" - Shizuo's being ignored by Izaya and feels upset about the fact. Drunk!Shizuo x Izaya, Slight OOC, oneshot. unBETA' ed


**A/N Ahhh, the Shizaya feels are coming back, it's ridiculous how addictive these two are.**

**Anyway, I was wondering this morning "what could happen if izaya got bored from being followed by shizuo" Like, even if it was just an "I'm tired" or an "I'm sick, I have no energy" type of thing, because we all know that Izaya can't ever lose interest in Shizuo.**

**They're slightly OOC, so please forgive me XD**

**ANYWAYLETSGO**

* * *

><p>"IIIIZZAAAAAYAAAAAAAAAA<strong>AAAAAAAA!" <strong>Shizuo yelled as he ran towards the fur-coated raven who was several meters ahead, walking peacefully. He grabbed a stop sign along the way before jumping in an attempt to hit his target. Much to his dismay, Izaya had dodged, just like he had several times before. Shizuo glared over at Izaya, a growl in his voice, "I thought I told you to stay out of this place, you FLEA."

"Ah, Shizu-chan." Izaya had stated, a blank expression on his face, although there was a slight smirk, it was being outweighed by his bored look. "What brings you here?~"

"What the fuck? You know why I'm here." Shizuo snarled angrily as he swung the sign, but Izaya had dodged again. "I thought I told you to stay out of Ikebukuro, you little flea!"

"You were right. You did tell me to stay out of here." Izaya replied simply, without even the smallest hint of playfulness hindering in his voice anymore, "But do you honestly think I'd ever listen?"

"Argh, you're so infuriating!"

"I know."

Shizuo picked up a nearby vending machine, ready to throw it at Izaya, when he saw the man calmly walking away. Angrier than before, he threw the vending machine, but Izaya had dodged again, but still he maintained a normal pace. He seemed disinterested. Shizuo felt a bit upset at that fact.

'Waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitasmallmoment.' Shizuo hastily thought to himself, 'I can't possible be upset! I should be glad that he's losing interest. Because then he'll leave and all my problems will be solved, yes!'

He looked up again to glance at Izaya, but it didn't look like he had turned around nor stopped walking. He then turned a corner and he was out of sight. Shizuo sighed out in triumph, his hands at his hips as he stood in a confident pose. 'Yes! Positive thinking! All we need to do is get that damned flea out of here!'

* * *

><p>Meanwhile...<p>

Izaya slumped in his chair as he watched Namie read out some notices to him. He wasn't paying attention, though. And that infuriated the young woman. "Oi. Are you listening, Izaya?"

"No. Get me some sushi."

"You little- You were just OUT." It took all of her self-control not to snap at her boss.

"And?- You know what, Namie, just get out of here and get me some goddamn sushi. When you come back, wipe all of the shelves." Izaya stated, slightly irritated as he spun and looked outside the glass window.

Namie swore under her breath and stormed out. Mumbling a 'whatever', she left leaving the raven-haired male to sigh deeply, before spinning around in his chair again. _He was so bored._

Yes, playing with Shizuo was fun for him, but you know when you get that tiring feeling in your legs that just won't let you do anything you want? He's been having that, and he's been knocking over anything he's passed by to get that irritating feeling out of his legs. Work had become a bit stressful lately, him having a **lot **of difficult clients to deal with, along with many nights without sleep due to him being so fatigued that he _couldn't even rest_.

He groaned loudly in frustration. Izaya couldn't possibly go back out to look for Shizuo to mess with, he couldn't be bothered. He was just too... sluggish to move. To make matters worse, there was no sushi. That just made everything much worse. Izaya just wanted to mess with that monstrous blonde. _Was that too much to ask for?_

* * *

><p>Three day time skip, back to Shizuo~<p>

Shizuo stormed about the streets, an angered expression on his face as he bit angrily onto the cigarette inside of his mouth before furiously spitting it at the sidewalk, not bothering to crumple it. Instead he continued to walk through the sidewalk, scaring the people who walked past him. He didn't know why but he was heavily upset because he hadn't seen a certain informant around for a few days.

'Why the hell am I upset over it?! I already decided that the fact that he's gone, that I should be _grateful_." Shizuo thought as he continued to stomp about the streets. He continued to wander about to clear his head, but it clearly wasn't working. He let his feet wander to take him to any destination, he didn't care at all at this point. He just needed somewhere to clear his thoughts.

Shizuo stopped when he heard muffled laughter coming from a nearby store. He looked up to see the bright, shining lights, and looked through the window to see the many men laughing and some passed out at the counters, drink glasses in their hands. It was decided. Shizuo was going to drink to forget.

* * *

><p>Izaya leaned back in his seat, eating up the ootoro laid out on his desk as he continued to type furiously on the keyboards, his eyes squinted at the screen. A sigh escaped him as he continued to type rapidly, chewing at the same time.<p>

Namie raised an eyebrow at the sight. She was more than pleased to see Izaya in such a state, but she had to ask. "What's wrong, Izaya?"

"What does it matter?" Izaya replied, a small smirk on his face as he glanced over at Namie, a bit irritated at the sudden question. He continued to type as if his life depended on it, before he slammed on the keys **ctrl **and **s, **saving his documents, before shutting down his computer. He looked up to the ceiling before spinning about in his chair, facing the glass window that overlooked the city.

Ah. This was what he liked. To see these humans wander about the streets, going to wherever they needed to go, doing whatever they pleased or doing things willingly even if they don't want to do it. But they were so predictable. All of them.

Just at the word 'predictable', he had remembered the one monster that was quite the opposite of that. Ah, yes, _Shizu-chan. _Izaya smirked to himself as the pet name came to his head, and he leaned back looking down at the shining lights of the stores, although he was spacing out more than he was staring.

'Wonder what that brute is doing now...?' Izaya sighed as he looked at the few drunk men that were being kicked out of the pub below. 'He could be asleep, or he could be eating ice-cream at the park... he's so unpredictable, it's insane.'

* * *

><p>Shizuo chugged down another beer and slammed the glass down on the counter, cracking both the glass and the counter. "I jusssss' don' get it, Celtyyyyyy" He growled angrily as Celty stared at him.<p>

-You should probably stop drinking. You've already had 7 glasses, Shizuo.-

"Shush up, you chimney." Shizuo slurred, but Celty tried to remain calm, because after all, Shizuo was drunk and didn't know what he was doing. What was Celty doing here?

Well.

She had happened to drive past when she heard a loud yell of 'IZAAAYAAAA' nearby. She turned and saw a slumped over Shizuo inside of the bar, and curiousity piqued, she walked inside, wondering as to what on earth Shizuo was yelling about. And now she was here, listening to his problems. _Great._

"Is he sick of me, Celty? Am I not fun anymore? Am I OLD?!" Shizuo frantically grabbed onto Celty's shoulders, yelling the last part. Celty looked around for anyone who could help, but everyone seemed as though they were deliberately ignoring the two. Celty slowly held Shizuo's hands and pried them off of her shoulders.

-Now who's sick of you?-

Shizuo took a few minutes to read the PDA, squinting hard as he mumbled words under his breath, comprehending what was typed out. When he finally read it, he slammed his head on the counter, his arms wrapped around his head.

"IZAYAAAAA" A pitiful cry left him, as if he felt heartbroken from remembering. Celty leaned over the counter before flashing her PDA at the bartender.

-Do you have a video camera I can borrow?-

The bartender hesitantly nodded, and Celty began to type again.

-Great, give me that video camera if you don't want to die tonight. Or if you do want to die tonight.-

* * *

><p>"Izaya, you should go to sleep, you look tired."<p>

"Awww~ Is Namie actually worried about me? Is the world finally ending?" Izaya asked in a sing-song tone, his hands at his cheeks like a lovestruck teenage girl. "I'm not tired at all~"

Namie glared at him angrily. Izaya had just asked her earlier to redust, rewipe, reclean everything in his apartment, no matter how clean she thought it was. He wanted it to be done. Namie clutched onto the cloth in her hand angrily at the mere memory of it, and decided that she should at least do or say something interesting while she was doing something so repetitive.

"Izaya, what's wrong?"

"Ugh, stop worrying, it's none of your concern." The playfulness left Izaya's voice as he spun his chair, not wanting to face the woman.

"You haven't been out for the past three days," Namie started before a smirk was on her face. "And you haven't been chasing around Shizuo for these past three days? What's wrong, you get caught in a lover's spat?"

Izaya spun quickly before slamming his hands down on the desk, to stop the spinning of the chair as he faced Namie's direction. "Namie, you suggest that again, there will be stumps where your feet should be, you got that?"

The two had then begun their own glaring contest, but it was disturbed by loud yelling from outside. Huh. Namie put the cloth down, glaring at Izaya before she walked over towards a window to look outside. "It's just the neighbours."

Now it wasn't a complete lie. It was the neighbours, but it wasn't _**just **_the neighbours. In fact, a certain blonde was causing quite the ruckus downstairs and outside on the street.

"Oh? Then what's with that smirk on your face, Namie?" Izaya asked, a devilish grin on his face as he stood up, leaning on his desk. Namie simply shrugged and walked away from the window, continuing her job as she wiped the shelves. Intrigued, Izaya walked towards the window, stifling the laughter that threatened to leave his mouth.

* * *

><p>Shizuo had actually stumbled out of the bar half an hour later after her chat with Celty. Celty offered to take him home, since he seemed too drunk to do anything by himself. She supported his arm over her shoulder, practically dragging the blonde man before dropping him on her motorcycle. Now, Celty would've taken him home, she would've been more than happy. But the blonde had thrown up quite a bit on her motorcycle, and she was just <em>slightly <em>peeved.

Celty hastily typed on her PDA.

-Where do you live, I'm taking you home.-

Shizuo slurred out an address, although not quite sure if it _was _his own, but Celty didn't quite know nor care at this point, and sped through the streets before dropping Shizuo off.

-Well, we're here. Good night, Shizuo.-

"Gnnnnnight, booby cat." Shizuo slurred again, a stupid grin on his face, but before Celty could even respond, she remember her motorcycle's state and sped home without thought.

Shizuo spun around, a bottle in his hand, and looked up at the apartments. Without much thought, he threw a bottle at the window, breaking the glass and waking up the residents from inside.

Shizuo put on a confused expression as he was being yelled at, not quite understanding the situation he was currently in. He smiled and snickered as they continued yelling, only serving to heighten their anger.

"What's your name?! We're reporting you to the police!" They yelled angrily at the blond man in a bartender suit. Quite weird, but that was the least of their worries.

"My name...? Is... Heiwajima... Shi... something." His words slurred again before he slammed his hand on the wall for support so that he didn't fall over, and the wall cracked majestically, a few pieces falling off.

The people gasped. "Heiwajima Shizuo! Oh, w-we're sorry but we have to go now." They weren't even sure if it was him or not, but by seeing the strength he had, they didn't want to take any chances. Shizuo looked at their retreating figures, a bit confused, but something else had caught his eye. That red-eyed beauty that was smiling at him from a different apartment block, up on a high floor.

It was if the angel was staring at him from the heavens. "I...za...ya..." Shizuo mumbled under his breath, his eyes widened as he stumbled across to stand in front of Izaya's apartment block, looking up at him.

* * *

><p>Izaya saw Shizuo walk towards his apartment, and he raised an eyebrow. He definitely did not want to pay any repair fines. Izaya just hoped that Shizuo had the sanity to not ruin his apartment right now.<p>

Izaya hesitantly opened the window and smiled brightly at Shizuo. "Shizu-chan~~"

Shizuo's eyes lit up like a child receiving a Christmas present at Izaya's voice. 'He's... he's interested in me, again.'

"It's night time and I need to sleep, so can you please come by tomorrow at a more reasonable hour?~~" Izaya asked playfully as he leaned his elbow on the windowsill, leaning his cheek on the palm of his hand.

Shizuo felt his heart break into a million pieces. He looked down at the ground, as if he was looking for the pieces that had 'fallen'. He looked up at Izaya again, a kicked-puppy expression on his face, and he definitely looked lost. "Izaya?"

Izaya was just dumbstruck as he saw the expression the manly blonde's face. Izaya felt a tinge of guilt. Wow, now he looks like the bad one. But this was definitely interesting. "Hey, Namie, look at this." He turned and beckoned the woman to come over, and hesitantly, Namie put down a duster and sighed, before heading over to the window.

Shizuo's eyes widened when a woman came in sight. She had leaned on the window with her elbows, watching Shizuo. It felt as if Shizuo's already broken heart was trampled on and vomited on like Celty's motorcy-

"IZAYAA!" He had yelled. Izaya heard his loud monstrous yell, but couldn't help but hear the small hint of desperation in the man's voice.

"Shizu-chan, please, people around here will complain more, and I don't think waking up to see blood all over the streets is a great sight." Izaya chuckled at the sight of Shizuo, even if his words were telling the blonde to stop, his eyes were just screaming 'I dare you'.

Shizuo felt tears well up in his eyes and he began bawling, which definitely took Izaya by surprise. "OhmygodNamieareyouseeingthis."

"Yes. I am right here."

"Shut up and get the video camera." Izaya shooed her away, without tearing his eyes away from Shizuo.

"I'm sorry~ But Iza-nii has to go now, okay Shizu-chan?" Izaya said with a concerned look on his face, although he had no intentions of leaving.

"NO!" Shizuo yelled in complete defiance. Namie had returned and began recording, and Izaya leaned more on the windowsill to watch Shizuo. And then... it happened.

The monster snapped.

"IZAAYAAAA" Shizuo yelled again, and Izaya giggled.

"Yes?~" There was a slight hesitant sound escaping Shizuo and Izaya watched him with interest. He wasn't expecting what came afterwards though.

"I COULD STAY AWAKE JUST TO HEAAAAR YOU BREATHING" The blonde had yelled/sang, earning a stifle of laughter from Namie. It earned him a shocked look from Izaya though. "WATCH YOU SMILE WHILE YOU ARE SLEEPING, WHILE YOU'RE FAR AWAY AND DREAMING"

"He's watched you sleep?" Namie asked, a smirk on her face.

"No, he fucking hasn't. Shut up, you incestuous skank." He practically hissed in spite, a bit of a blush on his face.

"I COULD SPEND MY LIFE IN THIS," Shizuo took a deep breath, "SWEEEEEET SURRENDER!"

"OhmygodforthesakeofhumanityShizu-chanIbegyoudon'tgothere-"

"I COULD STAY LOST IN THIS MOMENT."

"Shizu-chan-"

"FOREVER."

"No-"

"EVERY MOMENT SPENT WITH YOU-"

"Ohmygod," Izaya had his face half-buried in his hands, this was interesting to say the least but...

"IS A MOMENT I TREASUREEEE!"

It was humiliating. Not only for him because passerby's were giving him the thumbs-up, not recognising the fact that these two were people that most people didn't want to get involved with. All Izaya could do was burn holes into their backs with his glare, and he couldn't exactly shout out the threats 'I know who you are' because that's just creepy. So he did it silently as he continued to watch the blonde.

"I DON'T WANT TO CLOSE MY EYYYYYES~"

"Pleasedo." Izaya mumbled into his hands.

"I DON'T WANT TO FAAAAAAALL ASLEEP COS-"

"I like this part." Namie whispered, earning a groan from Izaya.

"I MISS YOU, IZAYA, AND I DON'T WANNA MISS A THING-"

"Ah, there was an extra syllable in your name, so he tried to fit it in. How cute." Namie said as she continued recording, quite pleased to see Izaya so humiliated.

This went on for a minute or so, and that was all Izaya could take.

"'CAUSE EVEN WHEN I DREAM OF YOUUU-"

"..."

"THE SWEETEST DREAM WILL NEEEEVER DO"

"I don't think he's lying." "Speak again, and each word will be $50 out of your paycheck, Namie."

"I ACTUALLY DREAM OF YOU, IZAYA, AND I DON'T WANNA MISS A THINGGGG-" Shizuo had changed the lyrics to his liking, too many syllables in one line making it sound odd, but he actually looked quite proud of himself.

"Ohmygodhedreamsofme." Izaya bured his face in both the palms of his hands, too embarrassed to say anything else.

"See." "That was $50, Namie."

'Oh, but it was totally worth it.' Which was all Namie could think of.

Shizuo had continued to sing with a strained voice, when finally, Izaya opened the door and walked downstairs, and came face to face with Shizuo. Izaya inwardly sighed, but Shizuo looked ecstatic. "You came~" Shizuo hugged onto Izaya and nuzzled his face into his neck.

Izaya hit Shizuo's back repeatedly. "Yes, yes, now come inside and stop causing a ruckus, you brute." Shizuo reeked of alcohol, and Izaya could feel the stench invade his nose.

Shizuo pulled back and his eyes were practically sparkling. "I-I get to go into Izaya's home? B-but, isn't your girlfriend over?"

Izaya snickered, "Namie is **definitely not **my girlfriend. Suggest that again and I swear you will wish you didn't come here."

* * *

><p>After a few minutes of trying to get Shizuo into the elevator and up to his front door, Izaya finally got to his door and opened it, only to have Shizuo crash into him from behind, tackling him to the floor.<p>

"Argh!" Izaya groaned as he clutched to his head before smirking at Shizuo. "Shizu-chan~ What are you doing?"

Shizuo didn't budge. He was currently hugging onto Izaya's legs, refusing to let go. Namie was still filming, but Izaya wasn't complaining, he wanted this blonde to remember everything after he was out of this mess.

Shizuo nuzzled his head inbetween Izaya's thighs, which caused the raven-haired male to blush furiously. "Shizu-chan! What are you doing!"

Shizuo's head snapped up at the sudden yell and his eyes had welled up with tears. He buried his head in Izaya's thighs once again, crying furiously.

"Izaya doesn't like me anymore! He's not interested!" Shizuo bawled, the vibrations from his voice sending tingles through Izaya's thighs... and other places.

"SHIZU. CHAN." Izaya pulled the blonde's head away, a blush obvious on his own face, as he breathed heavily, obviously out of breath. Without another second wasted, Izaya dragged Shizuo to the couch and dumped him there. "Now go to sleep."

Izaya wasn't always angry. But when he was... well, he wasn't. Before Izaya could turn to leave, Shizuo wrapped his arms around Izaya's slim waist and he mumbled into the other's butt. "Don't leave."

Izaya couldn't even be bothered to yell at Shizuo at this point, and let himself be pulled down on the couch with Shizuo. Quietly, he waved at Namie to come over, and when she did, he told her to leave the video camera on a place where they'd be visible. "And you can go home. It's pretty late."

Namie nodded and left the video camera before leaving the apartment. Izaya sighed out in relief when she finally left, he felt like he couldn't concentrate on the current situation if that witch was watching him.

Now...

"Shizu-chan, what's wrong?" Izaya asked 'kindly', as he sat up, running his hands through Shizuo's bleached to blonde hair. The blonde seemed to be relaxed by this, and let his head fall to Izaya's lap, although he was still clinging to his waist.

"Izaya's not interested in me anymore."

"You've been saying that and I don't quite understand, Shizu-chan."

"Izaya... he hasn't been around for three days and I miss him!" Before he could continue, his cries began once more as he had his face facing down on Izaya's lap.

Izaya sighed again, but snickered, quite entertained. "Why don't you tell him?~"

"H-he doesn't want to see me."

"Why do you think that?"

"Why else would that flea have such a bored expression around me?" Shizuo practically yelled, sending vibrations through Izaya's body once more, causing the poor raven some discomfort.

"Maybe... he's tired? Or he's busy with work? Or maybe," He leaned in and whispered into Shizuo's ear, "He does want to play with you, but he wants you to chase after him more~"

Shizuo's ears turned red, and Izaya couldn't help but find him adorable. Shizuo looked up again and leaned on his arm to support him as he got up from his position on Izaya's lap. A startled expression replaced his flushed one. "I-Izaya? What are you doing here?"

Izaya smiled and shrugged, "It's my apartment, Shizuo.~"

"I-I should go, goodnight, Izaya." Shizuo flustered nervously, still drunk. Izaya hummed in agreement, but before Shizuo could get up from the couch, Izaya placed his hand on Shizuo's and leaned in giving him a kiss on the lips. Izaya placed his hands behind Shizuo's head, pulling him in, and Shizuo wasn't complaining.

The two were engaged in a heated kiss on the couch before Izaya finally released and whispered into his ear, "Visit me again, kay, Shizu-chan?~ And don't worry, I won't forget to visit you too~"

Shizuo flushed in embarrassment before nodding. He stuttered out his goodbye before stumbling out of the apartment, leaving Izaya in a good mood. Izaya hummed happily, before getting up and fetching the video camera, stopping the filming and sighing in content. A drunk Shizuo was such a sweetie. So... unpredictable.

He skipped away to his computer to create several copies of the video, before watching it on his plasma TV, watching it happily. Maybe now, he could be more determined to finish most of his work so he can spend the time playing with his monster, _Shizu-chan_.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile...<p>

Shizuo stumbled outside of the apartment before looking up at the night sky. He felt ecstatic, like he was walking on clouds. Although drunk, he still had the memory and the feeling of Izaya's lips on his. Happily, he ran down the streets, yelling,

"I LOVE IKEBUKURO!" All before running into a trashcan and stumbling, hearing an annoyed yell of "NOBODY CARES!" from a nearby apartment.

* * *

><p>Epilogue...<p>

Shizuo had woken up with the worst, and I mean, the worst hangover known to grumbled angrily as he looked at the bathroom mirror at his own apartment, before consciously touching his lips. Huh, it felt weird.

Now, Shizuo was drunk during the late-night of events, but he knew. He just fucking knew. That somehow the flea was involved in all of this. Without hesitation, he slipped his clothes on and ran out on the streets, off to Izaya's house. He ran up the stairs, before kicking his door down, grumbling "IZZAAAAYAAAAA" slowly and threateningly.

He was met with two faces. A slightly entertained expression on one, and a bright and ecstatic look on the other. Namie being the former, Izaya being the latter. Shizuo was, no doubt, confused, when Izaya skipped up to him and wrapped his arms around Shizuo's neck.

"Shi~zu~chan!"

"Wha-" the bodyguard's words were cut off when Izaya leaned up and kissed him before releasing him quickly.

"Sing to me again, will you, Shizu-chan?" Izaya playfully asked, batting his eyelashes in a very irritating manner.

"Yes, let's hope you warmed up." Namie mumbled under her breath, causing Shizuo to become very, very, **very confused. **

"What. Wait. Last night..." Shizuo trailed off.

'Shit, wait, I was out drinking, and I saw Celty and... she drove me somewhere... and...' Shizuo hit his head, so that he was able to remember the rest of his nightly activities, and all before he looked at Izaya, his face flushed.

"Ooooh my God, no, I didn't. Did I- or was I-"

Izaya nodded and leaned up for an eskimo kiss, tapping his nose on Shizuo's. "Ahh~ The monster of Ikebukuro wants my, Orihara Izaya's, attention. It's cute, if I say so myself, ne, Namie?"

Namie didn't respond, and Izaya ignored it.

"Shhh... SHUT UP-" Shizuo yelled in embarrassment, before hiding his face in his hands. "Ohmygodandyoukissedmeandohmygodohmygodohmygod."

"Calm down, Shizu-chan, it's not like I'm not pregnant or anything." Izaya snickered before removing Shizuo's hands from his face, "That is if you even know how babies are made."

"I DO, YOU FL- JUST." Shizuo yelled, "FORGET I DID ANYTHING LAST NIGHT."

"Ah~ That's quite impossible. Since, now, I promise to give all of my attention to Shizu-chan now." Izaya leaned up and kissed the blonde's nose. Izaya leaned in again and kissed him lightly on the lips, in which Shizuo wasn't fighting back. He felt the raven smirk on his lips, before the said raven stopped the kiss. "For now and forever, ne?~"

Shizuo wouldn't have it any other way.

...Let's just hope he doesn't find about Izaya's and Celty's video recordings.

* * *

><p><strong>AN AH YES, SHIZAYA YOU WONDERFUL SHIP WHAT WILL I DO WITHOUT YOU**

**NOTHING THATS WHAT**

**BECAUSE I'D BE DED-**

**ANYWAY, i hope you enjoyed that fanfic! I'll see you all next time~~~~**


End file.
